Bad Name For Barbers

I COULD HARDLY BELIEVE THE NAME OF THIS BARBERS SHOP! What were they thinking? We were sent this snap taken in deepest darkest England recently, and can only think that this must be an example of some wry local humour.

Things are definitely getting worse when a barber calls his shop “Wiggies”.  What do you think? Do you fancy your chances?  One has to suppose that a bad haircut could easily be solved by a new wig!

 

Danger Pond!

A PLEASANT STROLL AROUND THE PONDS OF QUEEN’S PARK SEEMED LIKE A DELIGHTFUL IDEA UNTIL THIS SCARY SIGN WAS NOTICED.

[Double left click on the image to enlarge, as always]

The picture I took shows a pond with a sign sticking out of it.  The sign simply says:

“DANGER
BLUE
GREEN
ALGAE”

What on earth does that mean?  Will this Blue Green Algae rise up from the depths and grab us by the ankles to drag us off to the deep?

Perhaps it just means we have a slip hazard — that blue green algae is slippery. Thing is, I could not see anything slippery on the paths.

What the devil is Blue Green Algae? Is it a dust? a liquid?  A winged serpent? What ought I be looking out for?  Will it fall from the trees? will it run after us? Is it blue or green — or blue-green — or do they mean it is both blue and green (that both the blue and the green varieties are dangerous)?

Yes, things are getting worse when signs strike fear into English-speaking passers-by.

Weird Danger Sign

I WAS STRUCK BY THIS UNUSUAL WARNING SIGN.

It seems to be alerting people to the danger of heavy stone ornaments overcoming their innate inertia to convert their potential energy into kinetic energy by suddenly becoming mobile and “leaping” from pedestals and other high places onto unwary bypassers.

The full sign is shown below — please double left click on the image to enlarge.

“Heavy stone ornaments can be unstable” is not really what one might call good news is it?  One would kind-of expect the heaviness to play a better part in making the stone ornament fairly stable.

Things are getting worse when, instead of ensuring the stability of heavy stone ornaments, a sign can be taken as good enough instead!  Particularly distressing is the additional sign regarding children!  Good grief, what kind of hazardous place is this?  Actually, it is a simple garden centre!

Just Another Hero?

WHAT IS GOING ON THE MINDS OF TOY MAKERS? Is it that they have run out of inspiration, or are they being controlled by the politically-correct brigade?

Just look at this toy (double left click on the image to enlarge).

It is called “MALE NURSE ACTION FIGURE” and includes a stethoscope and an x-ray clipboard! The tag line is: Physicians prescribe, Nurses provide!

Wait – a Male nurse action figure? Action? irrespective of gender, what on earth is going on? can a nurse really be the inspiration for an action figure? Am I missing something in my career as a ninja marine? This toy is actually worse than The Office Worker Action Figure I posted about back in July 2008.

Things are definitely getting worse when children want to get their excitement from male nursing. Hey, maybe they are all meant to be choking hazards so that you can heroically do the “Heimlich”.

Lidl Logic

I WAS AMAZED AT A POSTER FOR LAMPS  SPOTTED IN A LOCAL SUPERMARKET.

Double left click on the image to enlarge — as ever

In case you cannot see the picture, it states:

Philips
Energy Saving
Light Bulb
* Bayonet Cap
*Screw Cap
49p each.

Under this, on a yellow background, it states:

5 for 50p

Now, this is pretty amazing when you stop to think about it; one costs 49p, but FIVE  costs just ONE PENNY more!  Who on Earth would ever buy just one?

Things are getting worse when a shop will allow someone to buy a single lamp at a comparatively extortionate price — why couldn’t the shop just sell the lamps for 10p each and be done with it? People who just need one could buy just one, and people who want 5 could get 5, and everyone pays the same price. It’s not rocket science.

Not an Exit

THIS IS A VERY STRANGE SCENE INDEED. We are grateful to have been sent this photograph; it shows very well that there are two main ways to approach a change of plan, namely: (i) that the original signs be removed, covered or replaced in favour of a new sign, or (ii) that a new, contradictory, sign be added to create utter confusion.

The option is also known as (a) sensible versus (b) daft. My, how things are getting worse!

No Parking Reason

THE SIGN IS PLAIN; IT STATES “NO PARKING” AND “24 HOUR ACCESS”.

The sign uses a nice clear font, black lettering on white, and a good size too — able to be read from the car — no need to park and get out to read this sign!

It contains all the relevant information — no threats of clamping, towing away or a fine.  It is quite to the point and succinct — until you spot the tiny yellow warning triangle at the top right corner.

Know, you do have to park, get out and go up to see what this is about.

How bizarre is that?  The warning triangle has a drawing of a running child, a trike and a ball along with a garage door that seems to be opening and closing at the same time.

As far as I am aware, this is not in the “Highway Code”, so someone has gone to a great deal of trouble to think up this sign and use it in this strange manner.

It may be that the sign maker had a sudden panic; what if non-English speakers wanted to park their car, the sign would not be understood!  This warning triangle seems like an after-thought. It is not a proper size to be seen from a short distance!

Oddly, there is a no-parking sign in the “Highway Code”, which begs the question — why didn’t they just use that instead?

Clearly, they wanted to provide reasons, using illustration.  However, this child and his toys do not really explain the requirement for 24 hour access!

Things are getting worse when we invent road signs that cannot be easily seen nor understood.

Council Cleaning Con

THE CITY COUNCIL ALWAYS AMAZES ME BY THEIR SHIRKING OF RESPONSIBILITY.

Take this poster for example.  Double left click on the image to enlarge.

This is a poster in a charity chop window on Kilmarnock Rd (which is the main street in Shawlands). It is about so-called “Community cleaning of a lane”.

Yes, it is advertising the fact that the council wants local residents to clean their own streets and lane.  Hey, isn’t that what we pay council tax for?

Things are getting worse when the council can take council tax from us, and then get us to do the work ourselves! How Bizarre!

Kebab Lunch

I WAS STRUCK BY THE MENU POSTED AT KEBAB JUNCTION, SO I HAD TO TAKE A SNAPSHOT FOR THIS SITE.

Please double left click on the image to enlarge.

If you cannot see the image for some reason, it states:

KEBAB JUNCTIONS
LUNCH TIME MEAL DEALS

Chick/ Lmb + chips

Kebab + chips

Pizza + chips (1 topping)

Chips + cheese

Don + chips

Spicy chicken + chips

Tandoori chicken + chips

Curry souce + rice

Chips cheese + curry souce

Baked patatoe + spicy chick/lamb

The lack of apostrophe in the shop’s name pales in comparison with the spelling of sauce (souce) and potato (patatoe). On the one hand they have lamb, on the other it’s abbreviated to Lmb.

Things are certainly getting worse when, in a kebab shop called “Kebab Junction, almost everything has chips, and “kebabs” are somewhat thin on the ground!

UFO Parking Bay

I SAW A VERY STRANGE THING IN THE CAR PARK OF THE ASDA SUPERMARKET IN GOVAN LAST NIGHT.

Normally (in my personal experience), supermarket car parks contain car parking bays and places for stacking up shopping carts.

Determining the one from the other is fairly straightforward; the bays for the carts have a trolley or two and rails at the sides to demarcate the region and to prevent damage to cars parked in the bays each side.

However, if you double left click on the image, you will see that this is a zone that is completely enclosed!  A trolley could not be wheeled in, and a car, pram or bike cannot be parked there — so this begs the question: what is this all about?

Things are getting worse when valuable parking space is wasted for no apparent reason. How bizarre! The only answer we can come up with is for UFOs.