Glasgow Crime Poster

[Photo of police poster]THIS POSTER WAS SPOTTED OUTSIDE CROSSMYLOOF RAILWAY STATION IN SHAWLANDS.

It states:

“3691
fewer victims of common assault”

I don’t know about you, but this poster troubled me.

First of all, why are the police paying for advertising posters like this? Is this a good use of financial resources? Perhaps, as a result of the suggested drop in criminal activity, the police have the time and money for this project?

It then begs the question, why are there fewer victims? The police deal with assault, rather than with the reasons for assault, so they cannot be given credit for lower crime, however, the poster carries the  suggestion that the Police have had some positive effect, that the police in some way are responsible for the drop in this crime figure, when such a notion is utterly preposterous.

This leads to the next question: are there fewer victims of common assault because of a drop in reported assaults, a change in the definition of common assault or victim, or a change in reporting period?  What is the context, and what possible reasons – what lessons can we learn? The poster is an insult to the intelligence.

We’re not especially au fait with Scots Law, so the term, common assault, suggests that there could well be other kinds of assault (although I don’t know what they are, nor if they exist), perhaps the figures have been manipulated such that the 3691, or a portion thereof, has been taken from the common assault category and simply moved to another category, or other categories, of assault.

I have a problem too with the number given.  It is not a percentage, it is an extremely precise (not rounded up or down) figure, 3691.

What does this number mean? Fewer than what and when? 3691 fewer than last week? Last year? what?

Finally, if the poster is not pro-Police, but simply to make Glaswegians happier or to feel safer, it fails miserably because 3691 is a massive number — and yet it is not the number of common assaults, it is merely the variation!  If 3691 is the drop, what on earth is the actual number of common assaults?  Having a drop of 3691 implies that common assaults must be many times greater than this figure.  One ought to immediately begin to take care as assault is very likely imminent.

I must say that it would not be much of a comfort to visitors to the city. Poor tourists! Mind you, they ought to have heard about Glasgow’s violent reputation before coming, from sites such as this. Or this.

Things are getting worse when Police put up posters to scare or con an unsuspecting public.

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Coleslaw Overkill

[Picture of tesco aisle - coleslaw]WE WERE GRATEFUL TO RECEIVE A PHOTOGRAPH BY E-MAIL OF A TESCO SUPERMARKET AISLE SIGN.

It would seem from this picture (click pic to enlarge), that there is a LOT of coleslaw on aisle 5.

Ironically, there was NO coleslaw to be found on aisle 5, just green vegetables on one side and ready meals on the other.

Perhaps Tesco were anticipating a great demand for coleslaw this Christmas holidays?

Who knows… but Merry Christmas with or without it anyway!

Bearly-Believe-It

[Picture of Evil Build-a-Bear] I WAS IN A BUILD-A-BEAR SHOP RECENTLY, AND WAS GIVEN A FEW SURPRISES.

The first one to take my notice was a Build-a-Bear version of the evil genius, Darth Vader from Star Wars! Now I am not quite sure what it would mean for a child to select this bear from the others on offer. I may be an old fuddy-duddy, perhaps these days playing with the baddies is fashionable or popular.

Picture of a Wheelchair for a teddy bear]I then noticed that you could get your Build-a-Bear disabled! Yes; they do wheelchairs for the bears.

They also do spectacles and much more. It really is a revelation; I thought it was simply a shop that made and sold teddy bears and accessories.  Who knew?

It could be argued that a disabled child might like to have toys that were also disabled, but I am not so sure.[Picture of a teddy bear earing spectacles] I am not entirely convinced that able-bodied children would like to play with disabled toys, and if they were, it would certainly raise my eyebrows as much as if they wanted to cuddle up at night with Darth Vader. Call me old-fashioned, but I think things are still getting worse.

 

 

Single Illnesses Only

[Picture of GP Notice 1 condition at a time]THE LATEST NHS RULE SEEMS TO BE THAT YOU CAN ONLY HAVE ONE ILLNESS AT A TIME.

This means that if you have two illnesses, you have to make two appointments and wait in the waiting room for each ailment.

This could be a problem for people who work — especially those who work for themselves, and more particularly, men; statistics show that men are less likely to visit the GP surgery than women.

I know men who work for themselves, who don’t want to bother the GP with “trifling” complaints, and who stock up ailments until matters reach the tipping point. In short, they visit the GP when they have collected a sufficient number of problems.

This is time management.  It is cost-effective for both the NHS and the patient.

But all that has changed. For each thing, patients now have to make a unique appointment, which lasts a maximum of ten minutes.

It used to be that a mother could visit the GP, discuss her baby’s problems, and have a personal issue raised at the same visit – while she’s sat there. This is no longer the case.

Things are definitely getting worse.

Leaf McDonalds

Mcdonald leafsPOOR SPELLING IS RIFE.

Things are getting worse. A walk around the city is always marred by signs and notices containing spelling errors and apostrophe abuse.

Bad education may explain hand-written errors, but we have always maintained that if a poster or notice is produced on a computer (irrespective of company size), it is not terribly difficult, nor too much to ask, to run a spell-check program.

When it comes to van livery, shop signage, and mass-produced marketing and advertising campaigns, then it is, we think, even more important to check and double check the work, especially if you are selling a service that claims to provide attention to detail. This site is full of examples where this has not happened.

With all this in mind, imagine getting it wrong on a grand scale — a large franchise’s make-over for all it’s branches. Something rolled-out across the country.

Imagine a place that attracts children, families, and which is trying to educate in its very décor.  This is happening with McDonalds.

Click on the image above to enlarge.

Looking at a pillar in a local restaurant, it is clear that McDonalds are trying to educate customers about their ingredients and philosophy. Note how they spell LEAVES.

Yes, they have a spelling mistake — “leafs”.

This fact was brought to my attention by a school child (aged about 7) who mentioned it to her mother.

Things are getting worse indeed.

Don’t Buy Condoms

[Poster about Free condoms]WE WERE INTERESTED TO DISCOVER THAT CONDOMS COST NOTHING IF YOU LIVE IN GLASGOW.

All you have to do is pop along and pick up as many as you need. No questions asked. This seems to be an endeavour to reduce teenage pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.

[close up of condom poster - with information]What we found more interesting is that the posters for this are located in Gents’ toilets in pubs and restaurants – next to condom dispensing machines! (see also this post)

From what we have heard, chaps would still rather pay a few quid to get dispensed condoms in a toilet than get free ones – and this is a great surprise to us.

We always assumed that men would fall into two camps, those who use condoms and those who refuse to. It had not occurred to us that the condom user camp would be divided into those who would rather buy them and those who like freebies!

Scary Waves

[Photo of radiation shields for mobile phones]WE LIVE IN A SCARY WORLD IT SEEMS.

I recently found in a shop items called “Radiation Shields”. These are for shielding you from the supposedly harmful radiation caused by mobile phone signals and by computer wi-fi zones.

This was a surprise to find, and suddenly I am extremely worried. [Click on image to enlarge]

Is the free wi-fi in my favourite café actually harming me?  Can everyone’s mobile phones be causing me harm? Do I need shielded from this “radiation”? The packaging suggests that this ought to be a real concern, the products have been “tested and approved”. Ought we not to be provided such things free on the NHS?  Why is this not a massive scandal?

If wi-fi and phone signals are safe, then how can selling such items be justified?

Things are getting worse when a little bit of browsing round the shops creates fear.

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