Way of Life

[Picture of fan heater]I WAS TAKEN ABACK BY THE DISCOVERY OF A FAN HEATER IN MY LOCAL SHOPS.

It showed a fan heater, but described it as a “Way of Life”.

“It’s a way of Life”  [click on image to enlarge]

Since when has using an electric fan heater a “way of life”?

Really? This item is a consumer lifestyle choice? Ooo Things are really getting worse indeed.

Winter Fashion Special

[Photo of newsagent shelf filled with women's magazine covers]THIS IS OUR FIRST EVER WINTER FASHION SPECIAL AT GETTING WORSE.

We have carried out a comprehensive study* of the current trends, and can reveal that this winter’s big thing is the red dress.

*a quick look along the newsagent’s display of women’s magazine covers. The photograph proves our findings. So if you do not want things to be getting worse, if you want to be bang up to the minute fashion-wise at Christmas, then WEAR RED.

You heard it here first (although it does work for Santa)!

Handbags for Him!

[Picture of Big Jessies with handbags]HANDBAGS FOR MEN?

This was ridiculed back when it was first proposed in the 1990s along with men’s face creams.  My, how we once laughed at those European men with their manbags.

We never thought it would happen here, but suddenly, it seems to have caught on in Glasgow.  Yes, Glasgow — the city known for calling a man a “poof” just for having an umbrella.  A place once proud of using plastic carrier bags in lieu of a proper hat.

[PictuGone are the man bags (such as attaché cases, briefcases, sports bags and rucksacks), it’s all full-on handbags nowadays.

I guess they need somewhere to put their cosmetics!  They certainly do not need a bag to carry CDs or tapes because we have MP3 players now.  The next thing is to have gents’ trousers and jackets with no pockets (you heard it here first).

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