About Face

THERE ARE A GREAT MANY SIGNS CONTAINING SPELLING ERRORS.

My favourite this week is from Shawlands. [Please click on the image to enlarge]

There is a lot of information on this sign, the word that caught my eye was “FACIA’S”

Clearly they meant “FASCIA”. It is a pity that no-one thought to use a spellchecker feature or a proof-reader.

The possessive apostrophe is also an error, it is clear that they intended the plural. The plural of FASCIA is not FASCIAS, but FASCIAE.

Now that would have put the cat amongst the pigeons!

Sign of The Times

I WAS SENT THIS PHOTOGRAPH BY EMAIL TODAY.

As you can see, this is a company looking for work. The company is called “The Sign Maker”, so it would be natural to assume that they are in the professional business of making signs. However, they seem to have chosen to make their own sign in a rather inexpensive way; this is a square off-cut of plywood board leaning against a roadside railing — facing the wrong way for passing traffic and at a level too low to be easily seen.

They have barely managed to fit in the title, “Sign Maker”, having started too far in from the left, with too large a font size (if you can call that scrawl a font)!  Having noticed the cramming on “Maker”, the next line is started below, further to the left, and with a smaller character height — resulting in too large a space to the right, so to finish off, the last line — the line with the contact details/ telephone number — is started further in again — and again, is crammed in!

This is ugly, ill-executed, illegal, and potentially dangerous. Graffiti is better executed.  There is neither artistic flair, nor any display of the basic concepts underpinning the concept of a “sign”. One wonders how much work this has generated.

Then again, perhaps this is a start-up company, by the look of it, a couple of illegal immigrant teenage entrepreneurs trying to find paid work that is different from washing cars? Who knows.

Things are getting worse when sign-makers cannot properly make signs for their sign-making business!

Yet Another Awful Handwritten Sign

SPECIAL OFFER SIGNS ARE SUPPOSED TO ATTRACT ATTENTION IN SUPERMARKETS, BUT THIS ONE ATTRACTED ATTENTION FOR THE WRONG REASONS.

It is handwritten, but nonetheless unchecked. Click on the image to enlarge.

If you cannot make it out for some reason, it states:

“SELECTED SAVOURIE
PICK AND MIX
ANY 6 FOR
£1.50
IDAL FOR
LUNCHES – PICNICS”

One is forced to wonder if the sign was done in a careless manner — in which case, what will the products be like?  Are they done just as carelessly?  What if the sign was checked, the mistakes noticed, but they couldn’t be bother doing it all over again?  Maybe that captures the work ethic at this store?

If so, then standards are certainly getting worse.

Fitting Advert

COMPANY IMAGE IS EVERYTHING.

On this site we often point out public signs that have errors.  This is because we feel that public signs, menus, notices and so forth should be checked for simple mistakes.

However, a company image goes beyond spelling and grammar, which is why we have shown some dubious logos (such as “Don’t Be Alarmed“).

Now, imagine a company that has only three main features (selling points) … (1) a van, (2) the spacial skills to know if and how things will fit ahead of time, and (3) how much care and attention to detail you have.

Imagine the livery of the van — what message would you be trying to get across?

You would probably want a van that looks clean, well-cared-for, professional, sturdy and which advertises with an office address, perhaps a logo, and a tag line.

Well, imagine now what we thought when we saw this van recently (see picture — click to enlarge).

Yes, things are getting worse when they cannot see ahead, when they cannot fit all the letters of the word across the van!

Report Anything Suspicious

SUSPICIOUS IS A FUNNY WORD, ISN’T IT?
I saw this sign in the Glasgow underground today — it states:

Outer Circle 1 min
Report Anything Suspicious

Now, the first thing I noticed was that something had been stuck — deliberately — to this sign.  Perhaps this was an attempt to obscure some important information?  Look closely at the picture — double click to enlarge for a better view — doesn’t that look suspicious?

It doesn’t say who to report to.  It doesn’t say how to make a report. It doesn’t say what might be described as “suspicious”.

I had a suspicion a train was coming – – ought I to report this fact to someone? I started to get worried, what was suspicious? Should I suspect people of being illegal immigrants?  of being closet homosexuals? Perhaps I ought to report that chap for looking “shifty” — that’s suspicious, isn’t it?

Things are definitely getting worse on the tube these days! In the end I reported the sign. “Outer Circles” are pretty suspicious, don’t you think?  A bit like crop circles maybe? Who knows!

How To Do The Loo

WE NOW NEED INSTRUCTIONS ON HOW TO USE THE TOILET.

Click on the picture to enlarge.

One has only to wonder at the reasons behind making this poster! Things are getting worse when this sign becomes necessary!

Under The Spell

IT HAS BEEN ANNOYING FOR YEARS, AND IT’S STILL THERE!

Despite a variety of alterations and modifications to the restaurant and shop over the years, Bella Napoli in Shawlands has never seen fit to fix the sign with the spelling mistake — even though it is the first thing you see when you walk in the door! (Click on the picture to enlarge).

This sign has been there from the very first day the place opened (which was when I first noticed that they couldn’t spell “sandwiches”). I would even forgive the weird extra apostrophe at the end of “Deli”, but not the extra “H”!

The Slippery Slope

SLIPPING SEEMS TO BE A WIDESPREAD PROBLEM — so why don’t shops have better floors?

I saw a daft notice on a shop window today. It states:

‘PLEASE NOTE

During wet conditions, excess water from prams
and umbrellas can make this floor very slippy,
whist (sic) every effort is being made to keep this
as dry as possible please wipe your feet, leave
umbrellas in the container provided and

PROCEED WITH CARE

Thank You’

Apart from the bad grammar and the typo on ‘whilst’, I could not find an umbrella container! The floor was polished glossy shiny tiles and looked slippery when dry. They actually were ‘wet look’ tiles!

The question is: why? — and ‘why should we put up with this silliness?’

Leaving the shop, it didn’t take me long to come across a ‘CAUTION – WET FLOOR’ board, because — let’s face it — we live in a country with high rainfall!

Maybe I am slow on the uptake, or a “bit thick”, but is it good enough to simply put up a sign? Does that mean the responsibility for slipping is transferred onto the victim? Should a person who slips be responsible as a result of being told about the risk or hazard? Perhaps I am supposed to change my footwear to something suitable to the conditions posted in signs?

Why is the floor wet? If we are talking about cleaning, could that not be done out of hours? If it is cleaning up an incident, then would it not be better to rope off the area or to actually DRY IT?

Architects ought to be taken out and shot for specifying such insane floor surfaces anyway — and things are getting worse because every shopping mall is filled with hi-gloss tiled finishes and these caution boards (what an eyesore), yet not everyone wears rubber-soled trainers. The entire floor of the new Silverburn shopping centre mall and shops (for example) make it difficult and exhausting to walk about!

Glasgow Shop’s Apostrophic Grammar!

BAD GRAMMAR IN PUBLIC NOTICES IS GETTING WORSE WHEN THE NOTICES ARE HANDWRITTEN. However, the problem is not merely confined to the handwritten; look at the shop front is the picture (click to enlarge).

This is an employment agency’s shop front. The entire window is an advertisement billboard, they are seeking (sic):-

• Joiner’s
• Plumber’s
• Electrician’s
• Labourer’s
• Cleaner’s
• Lineworker’s

This is a bizarre example of misuse of the apostrophe. One would think that someone would have told them by now, but it has been like this for ages. Perhaps people do not realise the problem.
Things are getting worse.

Don’t Be Alarmed!

ALARMS ARE JUST A NUISANCE. There should be a law against them.

The best that can be said for an alarm is that it might be something of a deterrent. However, consider this sign for a security firm. Does it scare you — do you even take it seriously? Can this logo have been designed by a graphic designer?

It looks like a pirate stealing a floppy drive for a computer, but there’s an American plug trailing behind. He’s got a weird set of cuban heels on — except his shadow doesn’t. There also seems to be some weird sort of plant encircling the shadowy figure.

I don’t know, maybe it’s just me, but I actually considered hiring a pirate’s costume and breaking into this building! Thing are getting worse!