The Urinator

I HAD TO TAKE A SNAPSHOT OF THIS PRODUCT IN MY LOCAL SHOP.

The Urinator — well, that caught my attention for sure!

Just in case you thought that The Urinator was some kind of strange superhero, it seems to be a product for potty-training infants!

So I thought I would find out more about The Urinator, and typed it into my browser’s address bar. I then got a pop up dialog box that stated:

Attention: The intent of the manufacture and sale of The Urinator is strictly for protecting your privacy of  a genetically predisposed medical condition

I clicked OK, and was presented with a website at www.urinator.com selling some “product” for nearly 150 US Dollars!  This simply cannot be the same thing as stocked in my local shop!

However, even after reading the page entitled “What is The Urinator?”, I had no idea what it is, does nor why it exists at all!

Another search turned up a tee-shirt at Zazzle.co.uk, so no luck with Google.

Things are getting worse when a product can easily be confused with another product altogether.

I eventually found a site called www.robharvey.com which had The Urinator – a product for cleaning items upon which cats and dogs have urinated. This doesn’t look like the product in my shop, and it is not for the same purpose (pets), but it is a lot nearer than all the other suggestions that the world’s favourite search engine returned. Anyway, couldn’t they have thought up a better name? Shhesh! It took me two minutes on the web, why couldn’t they have done this before naming their product and printing those labels?

Bad Name For Barbers

I COULD HARDLY BELIEVE THE NAME OF THIS BARBERS SHOP! What were they thinking? We were sent this snap taken in deepest darkest England recently, and can only think that this must be an example of some wry local humour.

Things are definitely getting worse when a barber calls his shop “Wiggies”.  What do you think? Do you fancy your chances?  One has to suppose that a bad haircut could easily be solved by a new wig!

 

Danger Pond!

A PLEASANT STROLL AROUND THE PONDS OF QUEEN’S PARK SEEMED LIKE A DELIGHTFUL IDEA UNTIL THIS SCARY SIGN WAS NOTICED.

[Double left click on the image to enlarge, as always]

The picture I took shows a pond with a sign sticking out of it.  The sign simply says:

“DANGER
BLUE
GREEN
ALGAE”

What on earth does that mean?  Will this Blue Green Algae rise up from the depths and grab us by the ankles to drag us off to the deep?

Perhaps it just means we have a slip hazard — that blue green algae is slippery. Thing is, I could not see anything slippery on the paths.

What the devil is Blue Green Algae? Is it a dust? a liquid?  A winged serpent? What ought I be looking out for?  Will it fall from the trees? will it run after us? Is it blue or green — or blue-green — or do they mean it is both blue and green (that both the blue and the green varieties are dangerous)?

Yes, things are getting worse when signs strike fear into English-speaking passers-by.

Just Another Hero?

WHAT IS GOING ON THE MINDS OF TOY MAKERS? Is it that they have run out of inspiration, or are they being controlled by the politically-correct brigade?

Just look at this toy (double left click on the image to enlarge).

It is called “MALE NURSE ACTION FIGURE” and includes a stethoscope and an x-ray clipboard! The tag line is: Physicians prescribe, Nurses provide!

Wait – a Male nurse action figure? Action? irrespective of gender, what on earth is going on? can a nurse really be the inspiration for an action figure? Am I missing something in my career as a ninja marine? This toy is actually worse than The Office Worker Action Figure I posted about back in July 2008.

Things are definitely getting worse when children want to get their excitement from male nursing. Hey, maybe they are all meant to be choking hazards so that you can heroically do the “Heimlich”.

Not an Exit

THIS IS A VERY STRANGE SCENE INDEED. We are grateful to have been sent this photograph; it shows very well that there are two main ways to approach a change of plan, namely: (i) that the original signs be removed, covered or replaced in favour of a new sign, or (ii) that a new, contradictory, sign be added to create utter confusion.

The option is also known as (a) sensible versus (b) daft. My, how things are getting worse!

UFO Parking Bay

I SAW A VERY STRANGE THING IN THE CAR PARK OF THE ASDA SUPERMARKET IN GOVAN LAST NIGHT.

Normally (in my personal experience), supermarket car parks contain car parking bays and places for stacking up shopping carts.

Determining the one from the other is fairly straightforward; the bays for the carts have a trolley or two and rails at the sides to demarcate the region and to prevent damage to cars parked in the bays each side.

However, if you double left click on the image, you will see that this is a zone that is completely enclosed!  A trolley could not be wheeled in, and a car, pram or bike cannot be parked there — so this begs the question: what is this all about?

Things are getting worse when valuable parking space is wasted for no apparent reason. How bizarre! The only answer we can come up with is for UFOs.

Blind Smokers!

IT IS HARD TO BELIEVE, BUT I CAME ACROSS A BRAILLE NO SMOKING SIGN TODAY.

Yes; it’s true.  In the middle of a wall, a sign with Braille for blind people to read should they happen across it.

Things are getting worse when a blind smoker has to feel around all the walls to check in case there is a sign forbidding smoking!

Brand & Ross

I WAS SURPRISED TO SEE A SIGN ON THE PAISLEY ROAD WEST IN GLASGOW.

It was about a property for let.  I couldn’t help but be struck by the name of the letting agency — Brand & Ross!

Could it be that the dynamic duo have abandoned cutting edge broadcasting in favour of a career in property management?  Things must be getting worse!

Good For Nothing

I SPOTTED THIS WEIRD CONSTRUCTION IN THE CITY CENTRE RECENTLY, AND WONDERED WHAT IT MIGHT BE (FOR).

Please double click on the pictures to enlarge for better viewing.

Look at it! There is a flight of stairs and a platform with a steel mesh surface.  There are safety handrails all round too — but what is it for?

Can you work it out? We can’t see the point of this thing.  It is sort of like a fire escape or access way, but as it does not connect to anything, these have to be ruled out. There is no swimming pool, so it cannot be an ugly diving board!

Such things are expensive, so things must be getting worse when this becomes a requirement!

Modern Architecture Summed Up

THERE’S A NEW BUILDING IN GLASGOW WITH A STRANGE ENTRANCE.

Please click on the images to enlarge.

First of all, the architect designed a grand entrance — including a revolving door, mirrored tiles, lots of glass and shiny tiled flooring.  Lovely.

However, in practice, there is a permanent plastic yellow warning cone about the slip danger on the shiny floor tiles.  How attractive!  Also – - because people prefer to walk in through a normal door (as opposed to a revolving door), they have had to Sellotape a notice to the glazed frontage.  Deary me!

Is this the architect’s vision?  How grand is this entrance now?  Why can’t the architect understand that shiny floor tiles are slippery, that yellow plastic cones are unattractive, and that notices ruin the clean straight lines, and glazed surfaces?

Isn’t it weird that there are TWO yellow slip warning cones IN the revolving door — making it impossible to use this door, but the Sellotaped notice on the window stops you using the “normal” door — so how exactly is one supposed to enter this office block? Is this MI5 or the HQ of the IQ?

Things are certainly getting worse when people cannot enter a building without warnings!

Funnily enough the biggest danger is right outside — and there is NO WARNING… it is a wall of glass!  Yes; an almost invisible obstruction to the pedestrian, to the drunk of a night.

What possessed the architect to put a square metre of thick glass on the pavement outside this building’s entrance?  It is as bizarre as it is amazing!

One has to wonder at the thought processes employed when designs are drawn up! Getting Worse? You Bet! Modern Architecture? Summed Up!