Elephant Saving Kitchen Paper

I WAS STOPPED DEAD IN MY TRACKS BY THE CLAIMS ON THIS PRODUCT IN MY LOCAL SUPERMARKET.

It states that — by simply buying their kitchen roll — you could save African Elephants!

No one wants to harm African elephants, which is (by implication) what you would be doing by either buying some other brand of kitchen roll, or simply by not buying this Thirst Pockets brand of kitchen roll.

Things are getting bad when the future of African elephants lies in the balance and depends on you  and your shopping decisions.

Brand New – Old Story

IT HAS TAKEN A LONG TIME, BUT FINALLY THE NEW SAINSBURY’S SUPERMARKET OPENED FOR BUSINESS.

I was surprised to discover, by virtue of the posted notice at the entrance (click image to enlarge photograph), that the brand new store had a very poor energy rating.

Things are indeed getting worse when buildings can be created that cost the earth.  One wonders if the sum total of the legislation in this regard results merely in the posting of a notice at the entrance.

Do NOT Pick Up Dog Dirt!

THE ONLY THING WORSE THAN DOG MESS ON THE PAVEMENT IS WHEN A HUMAN BEING PICKS UP THE DOG MESS.

I saw it this morning: a woman watched her dog do it’s business. She then reached into her anorak pocket and produced a scrunched-up Morrison’s Supermarket carrier bag.  She pulled it over her hand, picked up the dog shit, and pulled the bag back over so that the shite was contained within the bag.

Now, this is wrong and disgusting on many levels in my opinion.  Let’s begin with the supermarket carrier bag — we’re supposed to be getting away from using these plastic bags as they last for millions of years on landfills and kill wild life. On top of this, Morrison’s carriers are largely clear and see-through — hardly appropriate for this purpose.

The next thing that gets me annoyed is that the dog is allowed to poop anywhere it likes, and the owner will pick it up.  This is not right; humans picking up after dogs is wrong — we’re acting like they are superior and we are the servants.

Think about it, a dog crap on the pavement is something to be avoided — and it can be avoided most of the time because is obviously present.  On the other hand, a dog poo that was lifted will leave residue and germs behind that are far less evident.  People do not see the danger and walk on the fouled region to then spread the germs on floors and carpets at home and in cars.  Kids drops things, bounce balls, and ride over such places to spread germs and infection far and wide.

The next issue I have with the pick-up scenario is the act of picking up the faeces — plastic bag or not. The way I see it, if you went to the toilet and did a poo, you would be just as separated from your own faecal matter — in your personal case, it’s toilet paper, in the dog fouling scenario, it is a plastic shopping bag.

The thing is you know that wiping your bum means you have germs and that you need to wash your hands — but people who pick up warm, freshly produced dog turds are in the street or in parks, and have no access to wash hand basins.  They are walking about with germs — and it is exactly as bad as not washing your hands after defecating in a WC.

How would you feel if someone walked their dog and then made you a sandwich?  I personally would feel that this is the same as someone making a sandwich after going for a dump and not washing their hands, or a mother changing a nappy and not washing her hands.

I saw Kim and Aggie’s TV show,”How Clean is Your House” a while back.  It was explained that germs from the toilet can spread upto eight feet away from the WC bowl.  They swabbed surfaces and items for laboratory testing, and faecal matter was discovered on toothbrushes and face flannels. Toothbrushes should be stored as far away as possible from toilet bowls — always inside  bathroom cabinets and with a case too if possible.

That is why toilets cannot be accessed from public rooms — especially kitchens,  but instead they have to be from hallways and corridors or, for example, in pubs and clubs, accessed via IVS spaces.  Toilets without windows have to by law have an extraction fan wired up to the lightswitch with an over run fo 20 minutes after you leave and switch off the light — yes, it is that serious.

People can be paranoid about sitting on toilet seats or touching toilet door handles or flush handles – yet, while germs are definitely passed via contact, there is a significant airborne spread. If you wipe your bottom — you are not coming into direct contact with faeces by virtue of the toilet paper.  Germs are in the toilet bowl, on the seat and on your wiping hand.  You will touch surfaces and spread the germs that jumped onto your hand.  Flushing creates the sneezing effect — a fine germ-filled mist or aerosol that spreads germs high and low, far and wide.  May people consider hand air driers to spread germs too — particularly when people wet their hands rather than washing them with soap and warm water.

The point I am labouring here is that germs are invisible and that they spread fast and far. Despite toilet paper and plastic bags.

• I therefore think there should be a ban on people picking up after their pooches.
• I do not think dogs should be allowed to poop anywhere: dogs should be made by their owners to poop in designated areas — perhaps in gutters at the roadside of the kerb (not on the pavement), where rain water will wash them down the drain.

We live in a world filled with MRSA, superbugs, allergies, and all sorts of illnesses that could be eradicated by better hygiene. The “Bag it and Bin It” campaign — I have argued here — is unhealthy for us all and something should be done.

My 1st Traffic Jam Puzzle

MY FIRST TRAFFIC JAM PUZZLE.

That’s what it says on the box.

Yes, things are that bad, and getting worse it would seem. Is there a grand plan to prepare children for inevitable traffic jams in later adult life?

Is there a grand plan perhaps to sell children a series of traffic jam puzzles? This is MY FIRST traffic jam puzzle — and that suggests the possibility of a second, third and who-knows how many more.

On further consideration, it is possible that the puzzle is “why have we got traffic jams”?  How much fun would it be to consider all the options to transport and travel for the 21st century. Yes, what a fun toy!

I don’t know about you, but this – whatever it is — does not immediately strike me as an absolutely brilliant idea for a children’s toy or game.  Things are definitely getting worse when someone can successfully pitch their idea about a puzzle for children based on traffic congestion.

Looking again at the box, I see that it could be that the entire reason for the traffic jam could be the child driving the big green tractor.  How hilarious! The child can play at being responsible for road rage and disgruntled commuters for the FIRST time! My, oh my; what kind of monsters are we trying to create here?

Bollards

BOLLARDS ARE SOFTER THAN YOU THINK.

The council put bollards up to try to stop cars being parked in particular areas, but it is not working on account of the fact that bollards are made from cheap soft plastic rubbish!

The moral of the story is to drive slowly at the bollards to bend them out of your way, allowing you to park wherever you want.

Council tax money well spent!

Break The Law

THE POLICE ARE CRACKING DOWN ON US AGAIN. They have been out and about all week causing traffic congestion for shoppers.  It is the three old chestnuts — parking, speeding and drink-driving.

Something is wrong with a society when ordinary everyday citizens are more concerned with getting caught by the authorities than by criminals.  I have seen grown men brought to tears by parking wardens, simply because their ticket at the meter bay expired ten minutes ago.

Things are getting worse.  Yet, what I do not understand is why it has to be that way.  Sure, it brings in an awful lot of money — it is all a hidden tax after all — but I think it is too high a price to pay, for the downside far outweighs the income.

For example, instead of putting money in a meter, you could just swipe your credit card and settle up at the end of the day.  The argument about short-stay periods is nonsense; just have a different rate for long stays.  That would mean that no person would be criminalised, stressed and angry — the NHS would see the benefit, and we’d have less road rage and a general lifting of mood.

Speed cameras are bad, and speed limits are silly.  Drivers panic when they see a speed camera, and speed limits cannot be taken seriously because they do not account for traffic jams, bad weather, late night driving and so forth.

Why are we putting up with this silliness? Speed limiters exist — see the photograph.  If no car could speed, this would free up the police to catch people driving dangerously or carelessly under the effects of drink or drugs.

The state pretends to be nannying us, protecting us, keeping us safe — but the truth is that we live in fear of the state — they are not there for us, they are out to get us, to take our money and ruin our lives — either by the consequences of human mistakes or by making us so paranoid and stressed out that we cannot actually live our lives freely.

Happy New Year!

Environmental Unhealth

I WAS SOMEWHAT AMAZED TO SEE FOUR THREE-BAR ELECTRIC FIRES ATTACHED TO THE OUTSIDE WALL OF A PUB IN THE CITY CENTRE.

Furthermore, two of them were full on — and it was before 8 am! And as though all that was not enough — they were heating the rubbish bin!

I cannot see breakfasters or diners wanting to sit outside next to the bins, and anyway, I didn’t see any tables and chairs.  It cannot merely be for tobacco smokers?  Not at 8am and next to a smelly gastro-pub bin, surely not!

Could this Argyle Street pub be the source of global warming? Is this a valiant Glaswegian attempt to combat the foul weather?

Perhaps this is to encourage recycling of food — the heat may attract homeless people to rummage through the bins. Then again it may attract vermin — or be a danger to birds or drugged up vandals.  The possibilities for harm and danger are probably endless. One wonders what the insurance is for all the family filled flats in the tenement above? One wonders what the profit margins must be for this place to be able to afford such extravagance.

Things are getting worse when 12kW can be burned away all night long to warm up lung-cancered Glaswegian drunks. This is bad for the environment, so someone ought to call the environmental health about this — refer them here to see the photographic proof; who would otherwise believe this one?

Danger Pond!

A PLEASANT STROLL AROUND THE PONDS OF QUEEN’S PARK SEEMED LIKE A DELIGHTFUL IDEA UNTIL THIS SCARY SIGN WAS NOTICED.

[Double left click on the image to enlarge, as always]

The picture I took shows a pond with a sign sticking out of it.  The sign simply says:

“DANGER
BLUE
GREEN
ALGAE”

What on earth does that mean?  Will this Blue Green Algae rise up from the depths and grab us by the ankles to drag us off to the deep?

Perhaps it just means we have a slip hazard — that blue green algae is slippery. Thing is, I could not see anything slippery on the paths.

What the devil is Blue Green Algae? Is it a dust? a liquid?  A winged serpent? What ought I be looking out for?  Will it fall from the trees? will it run after us? Is it blue or green — or blue-green — or do they mean it is both blue and green (that both the blue and the green varieties are dangerous)?

Yes, things are getting worse when signs strike fear into English-speaking passers-by.

Lidl Logic

I WAS AMAZED AT A POSTER FOR LAMPS  SPOTTED IN A LOCAL SUPERMARKET.

Double left click on the image to enlarge — as ever

In case you cannot see the picture, it states:

Philips
Energy Saving
Light Bulb
* Bayonet Cap
*Screw Cap
49p each.

Under this, on a yellow background, it states:

5 for 50p

Now, this is pretty amazing when you stop to think about it; one costs 49p, but FIVE  costs just ONE PENNY more!  Who on Earth would ever buy just one?

Things are getting worse when a shop will allow someone to buy a single lamp at a comparatively extortionate price — why couldn’t the shop just sell the lamps for 10p each and be done with it? People who just need one could buy just one, and people who want 5 could get 5, and everyone pays the same price. It’s not rocket science.

Council Cleaning Con

THE CITY COUNCIL ALWAYS AMAZES ME BY THEIR SHIRKING OF RESPONSIBILITY.

Take this poster for example.  Double left click on the image to enlarge.

This is a poster in a charity chop window on Kilmarnock Rd (which is the main street in Shawlands). It is about so-called “Community cleaning of a lane”.

Yes, it is advertising the fact that the council wants local residents to clean their own streets and lane.  Hey, isn’t that what we pay council tax for?

Things are getting worse when the council can take council tax from us, and then get us to do the work ourselves! How Bizarre!