NCP Tackle Homelessness

I WAS PLEASED TO SEE THAT A CITY CENTRE CAR PARK HAS PROVIDED THE HOMELESS WITH A PLACE TO STAY.

I took a picture with my cameraphone. Click on the image to enlarge.

It shows a wheelie bin outside the car park.  The bin is filled and overflowing. On the side is written

NCP
REFUGE
ONLY

It is so nice to know that there is a refuge at the NCP. I had always thought of those wheely bins as being for Refuse or Rubbish, and it would certainly seem to be the case that some silly person has mixed up Refuse with refuge and filled the wheely bin with refuse! I do hope this doesn’t inconvenience the homeless people using the bin as refuge at this time of year.

See Men?

WE WERE SENT THIS OFFICIAL NOTICE FROM ST. ANDREW’S UNIVERSITY.

Please click to enlarge image. It reads as follows:

“Masturbation Notice

Masturbation in the library toilet is a violation of the University of St Andrews Library Regulations

The recently refurbished toilet floors are not designed to handle your semen!

The excessive amount of semen on the floor cost thousands of pounds to be removed professionally and must be reflected in tuition fee rises for next year.

It’s your money.

Please go home and masturbate if you are bored.

Please enquire at the Library Help Desk if you have any questions. Thank your for your cooperation”

I don’t know about you, but this notice raised quite a few questions in my mind. First of all — there are actual, professional semen removal companies? The next question is the obvious one — if you just bought a new floor, why did you not get one that could handle the excessive semen?

Third question: toilet cleaning comes out of tuition budget? Fourth question: is this excessive semen problem restricted to the library toilet? What kind of publications are available there? Fifth question: The university are remiss in not taking the opportunity of requesting wankers to wash their hands before leaving the toilet to handle books.

Things are getting worse when universities cannot see a better way to solve a “situation” than a badly conceived “notice”. The statement, “It’s your money” allows the student to justify the act. Think about it, if only 1 per cent leave a sticky floor, 100% pay for it in increased fees. Economies of scale come into play, meaning it is individually cheaper for the wanker to let everyone chip in next year.

My final question has to be, how bad is this semen problem for goodness sake? Surely a quick mop round would clean things up? What on earth is this all about really?

The World is Scary

WITH HALLOWEEN COMING UP, I THOUGHT I WOULD SHARE SOME PICTURES SENT TO US.

We do not usually do this as there are plenty of websites out there that do this sort of thing so much better. However, rules have exceptions, and this year ours are as follows:

First of all is a set of small screwdrivers.  Even given the fact that they may be made in a  non-English-speaking environment, the declaration defies a logical mistranslation-based explanation.

NOT TO BE INSERTED INTO PENIS

That is (always) good advice.

The second one caught my eye, because we are not supposed to use the word “Disabled”, so — for example, a disabled toilet is now to be known as an “accessible toilet”.

This sort of thing will surely play havoc with translations in years to come. In our next picture, we have “Deformed Person”.

The final one is the old favourite — public notices that have bad grammar or poor spelling.

What makes this one funnier is that it is black people in the USA with protest boards upon which they make reference to Martin Luther King Jr’s famous “I have a Dream” speech.

Dr King wanted black people to be educated equally with whites.  As the picture taken of a TV screen shows, black people in America are now just as badly educated as white folks.  They cannot even spell the word, DREAM on placards used in a public and televised protest. Ironic.

Things may be getting worse round here, but the world out there is a scary place too. Happy Halloween!

 

D+ Stress

I WAS STRUCK BY THIS NOTICE IN A HIGH SCHOOL & TOOK A PHOTOGRAPH USING MY CAMERAPHONE.

Click to enlarge image. It reads:

“Youth Stress Centre

Aromatheraphy Massage
Reiki
Self-Esteem
Relaxation
Reflexology
Stress Management
Anger Management

Appointments available at
Castlemilk Stress Centre
109 Stravanan Road
(above the shops)
Call us on 630 0111

MONDAY’S 6.00-8.30
WEDNESDAY’S 6.30-8.30

Funded by The National Lottery
NHS Greater Glasgow”

Where do I start? I have a problem with children going above shops for a massage.  This did not happen in my day, and I am not convinced it ought to happen today.

If  we overlook the terrible use of the apostrophe, the hours appear to indicate very early morning, before school starts.  On the other hand, perhaps it is meant to be PM  rather than AM or 24 hour clock, it is difficult to know for sure.  As Castlemilk is a very deprived and rough council estate, getting the times correct would be important, especially if one wanted to have less stress.

I do not understand how this can be part of the NHS, and yet receive funding from the National Lottery. I also do not understand how things like Reiki can be available under the auspices of either body when it is not recognised.  The Roman Catholic Church, for example, has outlawed Reiki practices as heretical and blasphemous!

• According to William T. Jarvis, Ph.D., of The National Council Against Health Fraud, there “is no evidence that clinical Reiki’s effects are due to anything other than suggestion” or the placebo effect.

Things are getting worse when school children are receiving early morning or late night hocus pocus to cope with “stress” all paid for by the Lottery and NHS. What will they do when they go to university or college — or later when they get a job? What will they do when they have real stress to deal with?

Would they not be better teaching children how to cope with their own stress, how to manage themselves without visiting a massage parlour in one of the biggest council estate black-spots in western Europe?

Grouching

KIDS TODAY! WHAT DO THEY KNOW?

It seems that they don’t know who Groucho Marx was, going on what I saw in a pound shop recently.  Please click on the picture to enlarge.

Things are getting worse indeed.  Time was when a child could put on a Groucho Marx disguise for a fancy dress party, and everyone would say, “There’s Groucho”.  Today, however, this same kit is now a “Nerdy Glasses Disguise”!

Groucho was never a nerd.  Do Nerds have moustaches like that?  Gimme a break!  It is a Groucho Marx kit minus the cigar (of course). Come on; credit where credit is due.

Speacil Baby

I WAS AMAZED TO SEE A CAKE PROUDLY DISPLAYED IN THE SHOP WINDOW OF A NEWLANDS BAKERY.

Being positioned so prominently, it is clear that the baker is proud of the skill and craftsmanship that went into the making of this celebratory cake — and perhaps with it, the hopes of attracting future commissions.

What is this cake? Well, a cursory inspection revealed a pinkness to the icing — suggesting the cake was for a girl or about a girly event.  There is a miniature baby in a nappy decorating the top of the cake, and the ABC nursery blocks shown on the side.

It is just possible that the cake is to celebrate the birth of a baby girl. I have personally never heard of this sort of thing, but — it is a definite possibility.  I suppose if it were a first birthday, it would say so.

Maybe it is for a special day — perhaps the day a baby is brought home from the maternity hospital or something.  Being pink it is certainly not for a circumcision!

If it is for an unspecified  “special day”, then the baker should be shot for being unable to spell the principal word — or is it a case of “well, that is exactly what the client wrote on the note”?

Either way, things are getting worse.

Bigotry Still Rife

THE MAIN HEADLINE IN A MAJOR SCOTTISH BROADSHEET NEWSPAPER CAUGHT MY ATTENTION.

“Hostility to Catholics is
‘deep, wide and vicious’”

Things are not getting better on the bigotry front here in Scotland, and that is a real shame. What can be done about this?  All we do is read articles in newspapers about how bad things are or how things are getting worse. Articles such as these:

• Council to Stem Bigot Parades, Clipped News, 2009-08-19;
• Bigotry Now All Over The Country, Clipped News, 2006-11-29;
• Glasgow Bigotry Alive and Kicking, Clipped News, 2004-11-23.

Let us not forget one of our own, high-hitting posts, IHF (I Hate Football), Getting Worse, 2 February 2008.

Some people still blame the segregated schools, but that is a red herring (see How To Manage Racism, Sectarianism and Sexism, RT1, Monday, 19 February 2007), because it seems that keeping religions and cultures apart is the best way, and that forced integration is making things worse.

Maybe the way forward is to celebrate differences and similarities, emphasise rather than hide, be proud of whatever it is you are, and keep away from “the other side” for as much as is humanly possible. It seems to work for the GAY and Lesbian community, or at least it is working better than it is for the rest of us in terms of sexism, racism, and sectarianism.

Pass The Rennies

GLASGOW’S MOST FAMOUS ARCHITECT IS CHARLES RENNIE MACKINTOSH, WHO WORKED WITH THE LOCAL FIRM OF HONEYMAN AND KEPPIE.

I feel sorry for the chap.  One can imagine that his friends and colleagues never discovered his silly middle name, “Rennie”. I recall that he had the nickname of “Tosh”, and was generally called Charles.  Maybe he got “Chick” or “Chuck”, and he signed “CR Mackintosh”.

However, these days, since his fame overtook that of Alexander “Greek” Thomson, we see everywhere, “Mockintosh” and all sorts of things purporting to be in his style.

His name seems now to be “RENNIE Macintosh” — the “Charles” has all but disappeared!  I see various spellings of the surname — “MacKintosh” (capitalised “K”), “McIntosh”, “MacIntosh” and “McKintosh”.  I feel sad for Charles that his silly, embarrassing middle name is now his most distinctive legacy.

The above sign reads:

“French Doors/ Rennie MacKintosh/ Doors / SUPPLIED & FITTED/ Complete with Brassware”

Mackintosh was never really known for doors, let alone “French Doors”. What exactly ARE “French Doors”?  My understanding of “French Windows” is a set of double Georgian glazed doors.  It is just possible that there is some confusion, and that these “Doors” are in fact “French Windows” — but not in any style associated with Charles Mackintosh!

No wonder he gave up architecture to become a watercolour painter!

Proffessional!

I TOOK THIS PICTURE WITH MY CAMERA-PHONE FROM THE UPSTAIRS OF MY BUS THIS MORNING, AND HAD TO SHARE IT WITH YOU ALL.

As you can see (please click on the image to enlarge), there are several windows completely covered with posters.  On one of them is the word “Profession”, but it is misspelled, “Proffesion“.

Other words appear in the series, on other windows, for example, “Legal” and “Council” as shown here in this snapshot.

Things are getting worse when people can put a lot of thought, time and effort into creating a message that is so prominently visible to thousands of bus passengers every day, yet which (instead of getting their point across effectively), manages to annoy and confuse!

Bad for Baby

I RECEIVED AN E-MAIL AND JUST HAD TO SHARE HERE THE  SCANNED NEWSPAPER CLIPPING FROM 2004 THAT WAS ATTACHED.

It’s from the Roanoke Times, and is captioned:

“Mellissa Williamson, 35, a Bullit Avenue resident, worries about the

effect on her unborn child from the sound of jackhammers”

Please double click on the picture to enlarge. The thing that immediately captures us in this country today is the fact that she has been snapped outside, in full pregnant profile, having a smoke of a cigarette.  Is she going outside to smoke? The road seems busy too; that looks like a busy junction — that would be a worry too.  Then there’re all the big cables swinging about above her head — ought she to start worrying about them?  The look like electricity cables.  I don’t give her child much chance of survival in that environment.

That’s only six years ago, but even so, back then we knew what would happen if this picture was published here — there would be an outcry against the mother-to-be for smoking.  Clearly, in this case, the picture is supposed to garner sympathy for the poor woman.

Maybe things are not getting worse, when compared with foreign parts, we can often come out being better.