Scent Off

ANIMAL URINE SEEMS TO BE MORE OF A PROBLEM THAN WE’D FIRST THOUGHT.

After last week’s post on The Urinator, we have received this photograph of a product called Scent Off. I Googled this name, and lo and behold a full page of results all about this product!  How very different from The Urinator!

Clearly the smell of cat and dog pee is a bigger issue than we’d known or suspected.  How come this is not advertised on TV? This ought to be part of the school curriculum.  We have to get the word out about this.

I would imagine that on a Saturday Night, a lot of places could do with being treated with Scent off or The Urinator.  Things are getting worse indeed!

 

The Urinator

I HAD TO TAKE A SNAPSHOT OF THIS PRODUCT IN MY LOCAL SHOP.

The Urinator — well, that caught my attention for sure!

Just in case you thought that The Urinator was some kind of strange superhero, it seems to be a product for potty-training infants!

So I thought I would find out more about The Urinator, and typed it into my browser’s address bar. I then got a pop up dialog box that stated:

Attention: The intent of the manufacture and sale of The Urinator is strictly for protecting your privacy of  a genetically predisposed medical condition

I clicked OK, and was presented with a website at www.urinator.com selling some “product” for nearly 150 US Dollars!  This simply cannot be the same thing as stocked in my local shop!

However, even after reading the page entitled “What is The Urinator?”, I had no idea what it is, does nor why it exists at all!

Another search turned up a tee-shirt at Zazzle.co.uk, so no luck with Google.

Things are getting worse when a product can easily be confused with another product altogether.

I eventually found a site called www.robharvey.com which had The Urinator – a product for cleaning items upon which cats and dogs have urinated. This doesn’t look like the product in my shop, and it is not for the same purpose (pets), but it is a lot nearer than all the other suggestions that the world’s favourite search engine returned. Anyway, couldn’t they have thought up a better name? Shhesh! It took me two minutes on the web, why couldn’t they have done this before naming their product and printing those labels?

Scotch Tat

IF THERE WAS ONE THING THAT DIVIDED GLASGOW FROM EDINBURGH IT WAS TOURIST TAT.

But now it seems to be changing; I have seen tourist tat increasingly in Glasgow shops.  Please click on the picture to enlarge.

The doll girls in tartan skirts, the mugs and teatowels with Edinburgh castle or The Forth Rail Bridge is all very well in auld Reekie — but surly not in Glasgow!

Things are getting worse when  such tat can be in  open display in Glasgow.  How awful!

Bad Name For Barbers

I COULD HARDLY BELIEVE THE NAME OF THIS BARBERS SHOP! What were they thinking? We were sent this snap taken in deepest darkest England recently, and can only think that this must be an example of some wry local humour.

Things are definitely getting worse when a barber calls his shop “Wiggies”.  What do you think? Do you fancy your chances?  One has to suppose that a bad haircut could easily be solved by a new wig!

 

Danger Pond!

A PLEASANT STROLL AROUND THE PONDS OF QUEEN’S PARK SEEMED LIKE A DELIGHTFUL IDEA UNTIL THIS SCARY SIGN WAS NOTICED.

[Double left click on the image to enlarge, as always]

The picture I took shows a pond with a sign sticking out of it.  The sign simply says:

“DANGER
BLUE
GREEN
ALGAE”

What on earth does that mean?  Will this Blue Green Algae rise up from the depths and grab us by the ankles to drag us off to the deep?

Perhaps it just means we have a slip hazard — that blue green algae is slippery. Thing is, I could not see anything slippery on the paths.

What the devil is Blue Green Algae? Is it a dust? a liquid?  A winged serpent? What ought I be looking out for?  Will it fall from the trees? will it run after us? Is it blue or green — or blue-green — or do they mean it is both blue and green (that both the blue and the green varieties are dangerous)?

Yes, things are getting worse when signs strike fear into English-speaking passers-by.

Weird Danger Sign

I WAS STRUCK BY THIS UNUSUAL WARNING SIGN.

It seems to be alerting people to the danger of heavy stone ornaments overcoming their innate inertia to convert their potential energy into kinetic energy by suddenly becoming mobile and “leaping” from pedestals and other high places onto unwary bypassers.

The full sign is shown below — please double left click on the image to enlarge.

“Heavy stone ornaments can be unstable” is not really what one might call good news is it?  One would kind-of expect the heaviness to play a better part in making the stone ornament fairly stable.

Things are getting worse when, instead of ensuring the stability of heavy stone ornaments, a sign can be taken as good enough instead!  Particularly distressing is the additional sign regarding children!  Good grief, what kind of hazardous place is this?  Actually, it is a simple garden centre!

Just Another Hero?

WHAT IS GOING ON THE MINDS OF TOY MAKERS? Is it that they have run out of inspiration, or are they being controlled by the politically-correct brigade?

Just look at this toy (double left click on the image to enlarge).

It is called “MALE NURSE ACTION FIGURE” and includes a stethoscope and an x-ray clipboard! The tag line is: Physicians prescribe, Nurses provide!

Wait – a Male nurse action figure? Action? irrespective of gender, what on earth is going on? can a nurse really be the inspiration for an action figure? Am I missing something in my career as a ninja marine? This toy is actually worse than The Office Worker Action Figure I posted about back in July 2008.

Things are definitely getting worse when children want to get their excitement from male nursing. Hey, maybe they are all meant to be choking hazards so that you can heroically do the “Heimlich”.

Lidl Logic

I WAS AMAZED AT A POSTER FOR LAMPS  SPOTTED IN A LOCAL SUPERMARKET.

Double left click on the image to enlarge — as ever

In case you cannot see the picture, it states:

Philips
Energy Saving
Light Bulb
* Bayonet Cap
*Screw Cap
49p each.

Under this, on a yellow background, it states:

5 for 50p

Now, this is pretty amazing when you stop to think about it; one costs 49p, but FIVE  costs just ONE PENNY more!  Who on Earth would ever buy just one?

Things are getting worse when a shop will allow someone to buy a single lamp at a comparatively extortionate price — why couldn’t the shop just sell the lamps for 10p each and be done with it? People who just need one could buy just one, and people who want 5 could get 5, and everyone pays the same price. It’s not rocket science.

Not an Exit

THIS IS A VERY STRANGE SCENE INDEED. We are grateful to have been sent this photograph; it shows very well that there are two main ways to approach a change of plan, namely: (i) that the original signs be removed, covered or replaced in favour of a new sign, or (ii) that a new, contradictory, sign be added to create utter confusion.

The option is also known as (a) sensible versus (b) daft. My, how things are getting worse!

Council Cleaning Con

THE CITY COUNCIL ALWAYS AMAZES ME BY THEIR SHIRKING OF RESPONSIBILITY.

Take this poster for example.  Double left click on the image to enlarge.

This is a poster in a charity chop window on Kilmarnock Rd (which is the main street in Shawlands). It is about so-called “Community cleaning of a lane”.

Yes, it is advertising the fact that the council wants local residents to clean their own streets and lane.  Hey, isn’t that what we pay council tax for?

Things are getting worse when the council can take council tax from us, and then get us to do the work ourselves! How Bizarre!